tennessee

HOPELESS WANDERER // ARKANSAS, ALABAMA, TENNESSEE, AND THE GREAT TALE OF MUMFORD & SONS

123 hours of travel time (5.125 days), 10 different cities in 3 different countries, countless tears shed, many laughs had, one shot of whiskey with Ted, two sweaty hugs with Winston, sun-kissed cheeks and noses, many dollars spent on merchandise (and beer), discovering small American towns and ancient European cities. It's funny to think my history with the band started in a giant, travelling hot dog; it's nice to know the journey continues to be just as wild and ridiculous. I’m happy to know the past 6 years with this band has been one of the greatest adventures of my life. 

LITTLE ROCK, ARKANSAS

I ask for a local beer to make myself seem cool. Bartenders like that, right? I can't get any pizza because all I've had are fiber protein bars and I feel like I will shit out all of my insides. Christ. I look around. Is it super noticeable that I'm awkwardly alone? It's probably super obvious. 

I sit in a Little Rock pizzeria, counting down the painfully slow minutes. I'm surrounded by couples and groups of friends, all most likely attending the same show that I will be. I sit there alone, uncomfortably crossing my legs, smeared lipstick, looking deeply involved with my phone. I'm texting him. I told myself I wouldn't, but here we are. He doesn't respond, and I feel even more alone. 

****

2010. Chicago. I thought I had liked him, but I suppose the only reason we dated is because he was the first guy ever to be remotely interested in me. The reality is, I hated him. But I always felt obligated to stay. I would listen to the band on repeat, singing of romance in the most beautiful way. I thought it couldn't be reality because my relationship wasn't like that. It would take me some months, but I finally realized that maybe they were right. The blizzard of 2011 was spent inside, curled up in a ball, the boy being ditched, but my pillow was still damp with tears but being assured through the lyrics of After the Storm that everything would be okay. He was gone, but I wasn't alone. 

BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA

I anxiously check my phone. 12:57. I wait. 12:59. What

I hate to admit this isn't the first time I've met a stranger off the internet. But this time it's from a Mumford and Sons fan site... she won't like, murder me, right? And this one said she'd bring me alcohol. I suppose that doesn't sound much better. However, I set off this year in hopes to have new experiences and to meet new people, so what the hell. What I was hoping for was someone to wait in line with me so I can be in the front, but what met me outside of BJCC was a purple haired, 31-year-old mother. She didn't much feel like waiting in line for the show, but rather to sit outside, drink whiskey, and wait for the band. I tend not to do those things, I'm usually to shy and terrified that I will be annoying the band but, at least I had a friend to push me out of my comfort zone.

Hours go by; we have conversations about what songs the band has covered, Laura Marling and Bear's Den, and the copious amounts we're traveled just to see them. It's nice to meet other fans. The sun reddened our foreheads, and before too long we had shared hugs with Winston and whiskey with Ted. After the show we followed up with the other two and before I knew it, I had four shiny new signatures on my phone case, and enough stories to tell for a lifetime. 

****

2012. Birmingham, England. We had been crushed for hours. The band sung on a B stage in the back of the arena, but the drunken chavs behind his blocked the sound. Rania was crying and there was nothing I could do about it. I felt so guilty; I had convinced her to come. We had only met a few months earlier. We were waiting in line at Rough Trade East, her telling stories in her British accent and I was immensely confused as to why she kept talking about Oslo. It took me awhile to put two and two together to figure out she was from Norway. We had only known each other for a couple of hours before I told her of my plans of travelling to Birmingham to see them there. She whole-heartedly agreed to come with me. After the soul-and-literally-body-crushing night we redeemed it (a little) by meeting Marcus. From there on, we would see the band in London, Paris, and Lewes. But more importantly, I had found a friend; a kindred spirit and companion, if only to habitually promote my obsessive tendencies.

NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE

Mm. I think I took it too far. I think I scared him off. I tell him that I can be a bit... wild when surrounded by the band. He tells me to release the monster. His death wish!

The night started with moonshine and ended with whiskey. Lots of whiskey. Andrew had never seen the band and I had never taken a non-crazy Mumford fan to their shows, but it was actually entirely stress-free, spending our time in the back, dancing wildly. We do-si-do during I Will Wait and jump like crazy during The Wolf. We're joined by a lone stranger, displaying the same amount of firey energy and I close my eyes, raise my hands in the air, and scream; a mere excuse to be human. 

****

2010-2016. Chicago. London. Nashville. I never know anyone when I move to a new city; the only thing that keeps me company is the music I keep. Lone nights spent in, friendless and scared in a new city, normally resulted in me putting on a pair of headphones and dancing alone in my room to these tunes that I've heard so many times before. There's always going to be the music, and there's always going to shows and the people who make them so enjoyable, and there will always be the tears and nights spent alone. And they will always be there, the band that's stuck with me through and through for six years to entertain and to comfort.

Mumford and Sons, I'm yours. 

 

 

 

BIG SOUTH FORK // TENNESSEE & KENTUCKY

Let's call it over-exhaustion from working nine days in a row, or over-stimulation of being a mere five feet from Britney Spears that caused me to oversleep and miss my bus to Chicago. Luckily, I live in TN, and there's plenty of adventures to be had; hiking through secluded forests and hills, abandoned train bridges, and of course, my new little baby nephew Carper awaited me in Kentucky. 

LOOK UP // FALL CREEK FALLS, TN

When I was in high school, a group of my guy friends took spring break down in Tennessee. I couldn't help but wonder what on earth could have been in Tennessee, so I like the millennial that I am, I Googled it. I was entranced with page after page of green hills and brushy mountains, topped with the cities of Knoxville, Nashville, and Memphis. It almost perfectly matched my idea of "the perfect location" (something that I dreamt up when I was 10, and have been searching for for the past 19 years). I was enamoured. 

Flash forward, and here I am, living amongst the green hills and brushy mountains. For as small as Tennessee actually is, I have barely seen any of it. I've lived in Nashville for 2+ years and have only done about half of the sites and restaurants off of my bucket list. I've only driven through Knoxville and haven't even dreamt of going west of Nashville towards Memphis. But I simply cannot get enough of the continuous beauty of the hills out in the country. They seem endless and grow larger and larger until they spring up into the Appalachian mountains. 

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It's hard; I want the mountains in my backyard and the skyline in the front. I cannot choose between the life of constant stimulation in the city or relaxed exploration of forests and waterfalls in the country. For now, a drive out into the limitless scenery of Tennessee will have to suffice.

ROAD TRIP: SMOKY MOUNTAINS

I had meticulously planned for a road trip through Arkansas, as I’m trying to get to all 50 states. Plans fell through, however, with a family emergency and I had to plan on being in West Virginia during that weekend. I shrugged off my vacation, thinking that I would stay home and get some stuff done, but the bug bit a few days prior to the trip and I took off on my own.

Where to, was the question. The quickest route to WV was straight through Kentucky, but that wasn’t something I was interested in. I needed the mountains, which is something I’ve been craving more and more recently. Luckily, the Smokies are only a three hour drive.

I spent the afternoon chasing mountain tops. It was a drive I had done only once before, but it’s strange familiarity made it seem like home. Everywhere was speckled in brown and yellow, and the closer I got to the top, the more insignificant I felt. The road twisted up the side; gaps in the trees provided fleeting glances of the mountain, as if we were all driving straight into them. I spent the afternoon chasing the light as I reached the top; chasing some kind of dream of the idea of home that I have.

smoky mountains national park

I am a total dreamer for a life in the mountains, be it Appalachian or Rocky or otherwise. While I've always lived in big cities, (Nashville for the time being can semi-count as a big city...) I think it's time for a life in the rural parts of the country. I want to wake up to the mountains, to the greenery, to the fresh air. I want bears to get in my trash and decorate my home with cheesy cabin decor. I want to live next to waterfalls and a national park. 

I remember when I was in middle school and I was riding the bus home through a rural country road through the woods, and the only thing I wanted was to replace those trees with big buildings. I thought I would have a fast paced life in New York City (I did...for 4 months) and that's how I wanted to live my life. Now all I want is for these big buildings to go away. 

My indecisiveness will always hinder my true desires. Mainly, I can't really figure out what those are. I like living in a city where I can go out to local restaurants and drink craft beer and see shows every month. And I'm trying to decide if it's worth giving all that up for a different pace of life. In the mean time, I'll enjoy the fact that I live a mere three hours from a beautiful National Park, where I can return time and time again, and dream of the mountain life. And thankfully I got to experience this trip with Frida, who I haven't seen since London. We ate lots of food, drank a lot of beer, spent far too much time in the hot tub, floated down the Little River, and drove to the highest point in Tennessee. It was a nice mini-adventure to share with her.